Sheezus ladies, where is the love?

bingo (1)So, I don't know if I've mentioned it, but my new book, Code Red is out 31st October 2014 - first cover preview - don't you love it? Lisa Mcloughlin is a GENIUS.Fact.

Anyway, I was making a period playlist to accompany the book, yep, I'm totally taking props from the movie No Strings Attached - googled 'Sheezus' by Lily Allen which I actually love on SO many levels, and found myself reading a feature in The Telegraph, by a female reporter, a self-proclaimed feminist, saying this song wasn't 'feminist enough'. A song that's been banned from US playlists because it talks about periods. I know, right?

Now firstly, there was a time, right up until I wrote SASSY that I wasn't entirely cool with the term 'feminist'. Because of the nature of my work for the past 16 years - working passionately with girls + women - it's often been assumed that I was one. A feminist that is.  But in the same way that I didn't want to be defined by the label on a pair of trainers, or the one that states what size my  favourite dress is, I also didn't want yet another label placed on me by which others could judge me. Besides, I didn't want equality. I wanted, I craved, I desired a deep + delicious understanding of the differences between men and women, so that we can both co-exist in total rhythm with our true nature. Women are striving SO hard to fit into a masculine ideal, to have what men have, but I don't want that, I'm a woman and for the first half of my menstrual cycle - approximately day 6 to 21 I'm happy to tap into my awesome masculine power to get shit done and make things happen, but for the second half of my cycle - day 22 through to my bleed, I want to honour my innate feminine nature, my need to retreat inwards, to be with myself. I want women not to feel pressured into working when they bleed, I want them to feel totally cool about taking time out at bleed time to honour their awesomeness as a woman, + I want for this NOT to make them a rubbish feminist or to be a sign of weakness.

Ladies, you bleed for 5 days or more each month and DON'T DIE. There is NOTHING weak about that.

Now, I'm told by women I dig like Caitlin Moran, that in order to be a feminist all I have to do is be a woman and give a shit. That's me. I'm a woman and I deffo give a shit. Yet I get called out for not wanting to do it like a dude.  Lilly Allen gets called out for not being feminist enough. And this isn't by dudes, this is by other women.

When a woman throws down the gauntlet and calls us all up to be sheezus, why are we finding fault in her instead of wanting to high five her? Why when a woman asks a simple question on twitter as to whether any countries subsidise tampons, does she get a barrage of abuse?yes, it was mostly from dudes - but there were a LOT of potty mouthed women spreading hate on there too. Why when super-hot Tess Munster posts a photo of herself in a bikini do other women feel the need to give her nutritional advice as to how to deal with obesity? When my gorgeous gal-pal Betty Pamper posts pictures of herself in awesome ensembles, why does she end up on a fat-hate website with dudes AND women pointing fingers + shaming her?

So this isn't a comment on what is, or isn't feminist, although I am really interested in your thoughts, I just felt the need to open up the conversation because, and yes, I'm totally channeling Will.I.Am, people got me questioning, Sheezus ladies, where is the love?

I would love to know your thoughts either in the comments below, or over at the Sassyology facebook page - let's talk.

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